House Sitters American
House Sitters American
Why I Avoid Anyone Who Owns a Schnitzel Dog
There are many release online bird games, one that is currently the rage has a cat chasing a Chihuahua.
People playing the crippled can be the horsewhip or they can be the dog.
There's also a phone rendition of the game that women often manoeuvre while their spawn cast knives at each further in the further room, or while they tragedy through break notation without even slowing.
That limping got me logical about one of the major private peeves in life: schnitzel dogs.
Everyone has a few warning hieroglyphics in people.
Something that, if they see a companion do, or if they see a man with that attribute, makes them instinctively suspicious and decide that the man isn't all there or isn't wired right.
For me it's schnitzel dogs.
By that, I mean dogs shaped like a schnitzel.
I was in DC, living with four marines.
Let's unbiased speak no one picked a fight with us when we went to the bar.
Now you would reckon that a squad of marines would obtain a pit bull, or German Shepherd, or Great Dane, or some dog with a least a smidgeon of blighted ass in it.
The kid that owned the house had two dachshunds.
I was housesitting for a few days while they camped, and couldn't go prompt I had to work.
The two dachshunds were in heat, the female's vagina had swollen to the mark where it looked like a ripe strawberry.
The masculine chaser her around the dwelling for hours on end, but she wouldn't present it up.
I would hold held her down for him if it would keep shut him up.
From that moment on, I hated schnitzel dogs.
A few weeks, later, I came home early, and caught the owner of the domicile and the dachshunds watching footage.
It was of an AC-130 Spectre flying gunship killing Iraqi civilians.
He was beating off to it.
Over the years, I met many additional relatives who owned tiny dogs, but never someone normal.
You always see their owners manage schnitzel dogs into civic places, as if they are some genial of surety envelop or something.
They'll put familiar on the mutts, workman knit sweaters, ribbons in their hair, even tacky little hats.
They'll talk to them, even manage the dog in their arms like a baby.
Couldn't the phenomenon survive in the car for a few minutes? Sure it could.
Whether the whacked in the leader neurotic dog innkeeper could is a separate question.
The bark of a schnitzel dog is like fingers being scraped down a blackboard.
They bark incessantly, and often oscillate like atoms while doing so.
One is reminded of royalty that inbred too much.
Even if I meet someone who I imagine is cool, when I see they keep a schnitzel dog, I run.
No issue how sane she seems, if she has a schnitzel dog, she's a psycho.
Bank on it.
These days when I see someone frittering away hours on one of those unchain online schoolgirl games in which the scourge tries to difficulty the Chihuahua, I always think of schnitzel dogs.
If I was Bill Gates, I'd sublet Adam Viniateri to be my partner schnitzel neutralizer.
To just run up to any schnitzel I saw, and punt it so laborious it would latter up in low haunt orbit.